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1  Main Forum / Around the Campfire / The Enlisted Marine on: February 02, 2015, 10:39:03 am
U.S.Marine Colonel was about to start the morning briefing to his staff.

While waiting for the coffee machine to finish brewing, the colonel decided to pose a question to all assembled.

He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep.

He posed the question of just how much of sex was "work" and how much of it was "pleasure"?

A Major chimed in with 75%-25% in favor of work.

A Captain said it was 50%-50%.

A Lieutenant responded with 25%-75% in favor of pleasure, depending upon his state of inebriation at the time.

There being no consensus, the colonel turned to the PFC who was in charge of making the coffee and asked for HIS opinion?

Without any hesitation, the young Lance Corporal responded, "Sir, it has to be 100% pleasure".

The colonel was surprised and as you might guess, asked why?

"Well, sir, if there was any work involved, the officers would have me doing it for them."

The room fell silent.

God Bless the enlisted man.
2  Main Forum / Around the Campfire / Children say the funniest things on: January 29, 2015, 11:51:46 am
An 8-year-old girl went to her grandfather, who was working in the yard and asked him, "Grandpa, what is couple sex?"

The grandfather was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she's old enough to ask the question, then she's old enough to get a straight answer.

Steeling himself to leave nothing out, he proceeded to tell her all about human reproduction and the joys and responsibilities of intercourse. When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open, eyes wide in amazement.

Seeing the look on her face, the grandfather asked her, "Why did you ask this question, honey?"

The little girl replied, "Grandma says that dinner will be ready in just a couple secs."
3  Main Forum / Around the Campfire / Fred on: January 28, 2015, 11:26:50 am
An Arizona Highway Patrol officer stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed limit, so he asks the biker his name.
'Fred,' he replies.
'Fred what?' the officer asks.
'Just Fred,' the man responds.
The officer is in a good mood, thinks he might just give the biker a break, and write him out a warning instead of a ticket.
The officer then presses him for the last name.
The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it.
The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. 'Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?'
The biker replies, 'It's a long story, so stay with me.' I was born Fred Johnson. I studied hard and got good grades. When I got older,
I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was
Fred Johnson, MD.
After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through School,
got my degree, so then I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS. Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she
gave me VD, so now I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS, with VD.
Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Johnson, MD, with VD. Then the AMA found out
about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Johnson with VD.
Then the VD took away my Johnson, so now I am Just Fred.'
4  Main Forum / Around the Campfire / Ole Olson, the Norwegian Salesman from Minnesota on: January 28, 2015, 10:31:00 am
Ole, the smoothest-talking Norske in the Minnesota National Guard and a natural born salesman, got called up to active duty.

  Ole's first assignment was in a military induction center. Because he was a good talker, they assigned him the duty of advising new recruits about government benefits, especially the GI life insurance, to which they were entitled.

 The officer in charge soon noticed that Ole was getting a 99% sign-up rate for the more expensive supplemental form of GI insurance. This was remarkable, because it cost these low-income recruits $30 per month for the higher coverage, compared to what the government was already providing at no charge. The officer decided he'd sit in the back of the room at the next briefing and observe Ole's sales pitch.

 Ole stood up before the latest group of inductees and said,"If you haf da normal GI insurans an' yoo go to Afghanistan an' get yourself killed, da governmen' pays yer beneficiary $20,000. If yoo take out da supplemental insurans, vich cost you only t'irty dollars a mont , den da governmen' got ta pay yer beneficiary $200,000! Now, Ole concluded, Vich bunch you tink dey gonna send ta Afghanistan first?"
5  Main Forum / Around the Campfire / Missing wife on: January 22, 2015, 01:05:01 pm
A husband went to the police station to report his missing wife:
Husband : I've lost my wife, she went shopping yesterday and has still not come home.
Sergeant : What is her height ?
Husband : Oh, 5 something, maybe 5'5
Sergeant : Build?
Husband : Not slim, not really fat, but could lose a few.

Sergeant : Color of eyes?
Husband : Dark. Not sure - maybe Brown.
Sergeant : Color of hair?
Husband : Changes according to season -  lightest brown now
Sergeant : What was she wearing?
Husband : I don't remember exactly but she wears jeans a lot.
Sergeant : Did she go in a car?
Husband : yes.
Sergeant : What kind of car was it?
Husband : 2015 Corvette Stingray 3LT with the Z51 Performance Package, shark gray metallic paint,  with the 6.2 liter V8 engine with Direct Injection generating 460 HP. 8-speed paddle-shift automatic transmission, and Black leather GT bucket seats, and has a very thin scratch on the front left door near the....... at this point the husband started crying...
                      Sergeant : Don't worry sir.......We'll find your car.   
6  Main Forum / Around the Campfire / Fisherman on: January 03, 2015, 12:56:11 pm
An RVer named Stan was stopped by a game warden as he was returning to his Winnebago with a bucket full of still-alive bass. "Do you have a license?" the game warden asked. The man replied, "No, sir. These are my pet fish." "Pet fish?" the warden asked. "Yes, sir. Every night I take them down to the lake and let them swim around for awhile. When they hear my whistle, they jump right back into the bucket and I take them back to the RV." "That's a bunch of baloney," the game warden said, to which the man responded "if you don't believe me, then follow me back to the lake to see for yourself." Still suspicious, but curious, the game warden agreed. And so they walked to the lake. There, the man let the fish out into the water, where they disappeared. "Okay," said the game warden. "Call them back." "Call who back?" "The fish," replied the warden. "What fish?" asked the man.
7  Main Forum / Around the Campfire / In memory of Billy on: January 03, 2015, 11:27:25 am
A young man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and is going to get married.
He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, "Okay, Ma. Guess which one I'm going to marry."
She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle." Stunned, the young man says, "That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"
"I don't like her," she says.
8  Main Forum / General Discussion / Re: Decisions Decisions on: November 12, 2014, 03:34:21 pm
Hopefully your still reading this thread had to add 2cents,,,,

good luck


Yep I'm still reading and learning. Next May we sell the big house and move into a little house. And then we can get the moving house!!
9  Main Forum / General Discussion / Re: Disappointing gas mileage on: October 08, 2014, 02:20:16 pm
What octane does the Ford V10 in these RVs call for?
10  Main Forum / General Discussion / Re: Disappointing gas mileage on: October 07, 2014, 01:06:57 pm
A app I use on my phone is I find it very easy to enter the info for as many vehicles as you want. It also keeps track of maintenance items etc. Most of all it's easy to use. While your standing at the pump you just enter the info on your smart phone. It connects to a website that you can access from a home or office desktop and that way print out graphs and all sorts of info on your vehicle. You don't have to use it every time you fill up which was a problem I had with other gas mileage trackers. It estimates what your total mileage is based on your use and every couple of months I go to the web site and just update that. I do try to use it every time as I'm self employed and my work mileage is deductible. It's has been a real benefit to my tax filing. I got audited once and when the IRS agent questioned my car deductions I pulled out my records from MyCarProjects and he closed the audit right then.
11  Main Forum / General Discussion / Re: New member on: August 07, 2014, 12:39:10 pm
We will be at Hersey too looking at them all but with a special interest in a 2552.
12  Main Forum / General Discussion / Re: vibration in driveline on: July 29, 2014, 11:56:22 am
What models of Cruisers have the 3rd shaft. Is this just a problem of the 2900 and 3100 series or does it also effect the shorter units?
13  Main Forum / Adventure Anywhere / Re: Acadia national park on: July 14, 2014, 01:27:32 pm
Dont miss the popovers at the Jordon Pond house.
14  Main Forum / General Discussion / Re: Decisions Decisions on: April 15, 2014, 03:15:42 pm
A helpful to Jim and Beth for showing us their customized 2910. Beautiful!
Richard & Jackie
15  Main Forum / General Discussion / Re: Where can I rent a Phoenix Cruiser on: March 29, 2014, 11:18:12 am
Thanks guys. This summer we are renting a class C to do just what 2 Frazzled did. I'm just hopeful that the well known problems of rental rigs won't turn my wife off. Ron Goodspeed was kind of enough to show us his old 2551 and we will be going to see his new 3100 soon. We will also be checking out a 2900 that is close by. And finally we are planning a trip to Hersey at the end of this summer to make a final decision. I've followed this thread for a while and like these units a lot. I especially like the strong loyalty voiced here and the customer service that Phoenix demonstrates. Plus Aimee and I have become good FB friends and seem to have similar musical taste! So we are narrowing our search. I like PCs because of the above mentioned items and their obvious quality. The other rig I like is the THOR ACE 29.2 for it's floor plan and and extremely attractive price. It was built to a price point though and it shows in certain areas.
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