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The 3rd Affair

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billy

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The 3rd Affair
« on: March 14, 2012, 10:11:26 pm »
 
A mortician was working late one night.
He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a startling discovery. Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen!
'I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz,' the mortician commented, 'I can't allow you to be cremated with such an impressive private part. It must be saved for posterity.'
So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home.
'I have something to show you won't believe,' he said to his wife, opening his briefcase.
'My God!' the wife exclaimed, 'Schwartz is dead!'
Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

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Bob Mahon

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Re: The 3rd Affair
« Reply #1 on: March 17, 2012, 07:06:07 am »
True story:

In the mid 1960z, when just starting out after the Navy, I took a few part-time jobs to earn a little extra money. One of them was driving the Hearse for a Funeral Home in Troy, MI (as the Owner/Mortician had an uncanny resemblance to a taller Fred Gwynne, I'll call him Fred).
Early one morning I got a call from Fred and told to pick up a corpse in Rochester. So I get dressed and off I go.
When I got there the LEO tells me the guy was Brace Beemer, the famed radio Lone Ranger.

When I finally get Mr. Beemer back and into the embalming room to the waiting Fred, Fred removes the shroud and discovers that Mr. Beemer was unusually well endowed. With a dead pan face, Fred turns to me and says "I send you to pick up the Lone Ranger and you bring me Silver".

Hey, Billy, you started it.
Carry on, regardless..................
"In God we trust" to save our country and bring our troops safely home.

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billy

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Re: The 3rd Affair
« Reply #2 on: March 17, 2012, 10:55:46 am »
 roflol roflol roflol    I love it!
Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

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JackD

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Re: The 3rd Affair
« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2012, 09:26:25 am »
Both great!!!
Jack